Footy Fan Makes Up For Lack Of Wit With Increased Volume
"Eddie McGuire and the Channel 9 execs reckon I’m producing just the sort of cutting edge comedy that would suit The Footy Show”
AFL To Throw Book At Fan Who ‘Wasted Beer’ Thrown At Essendon Players
"To waste precious beer in this era of resource shortages is absolutely disgusting! You realise the Amazon rainforest is burning right?"
Retiring Winx Too Emotional For Post-Race Interview
Winx’s trainer and close personal friend, Chris Waller wasn’t surprised that the touching finale to her career left the record-breaker lost for words.
Clarko Meets Gil For Coffee After Only Getting Eight 50m Penalties Against Port
“The umpires have to realise it’s a critical part of how we move the ball forward”
David King Reveals Total Score As Critical KPI For Winning Grand Finals
“We’ve been working overtime in The Lab, and even summoned some analysis from The War Room to deliver this exclusive”
Ross Lyon Claims The 158-25 Score Flattered Geelong
"We had a couple of 50/50 calls go against us early in the second quarter. If they’re called our way, who knows?"