Friday, March 22, 2019
David King

David King Reveals Total Score As Critical KPI For Winning Grand Finals

“We’ve been working overtime in The Lab, and even summoned some analysis from The War Room to deliver this exclusive”
Ticketek Apologises

Ticketek Apologises In Advance For Issues Buying Grand Final Tickets

“The horrible service we deliver allows us to keep the handling fee for printing out your own ticket under $10"
Mute Basil Zempilas

Fox Footy Launches Press Red To Mute Basil Zempilas Feature

Foxtel subscribers will now have the option to mute Basil Zempilas commentary during any AFL game he broadcasts.
AFL Live Ladder

Channel 7 Shows AFL Live Ladder After First Point Scored

"It turns out that spamming viewers with a Live Ladder every two minutes and blocking out a chunk of the screen takes it to a whole new level"
Ross Lyon

Ross Lyon Claims The 158-25 Score Flattered Geelong

"We had a couple of 50/50 calls go against us early in the second quarter. If they’re called our way, who knows?"
Carlton Fan

Carlton Fan Stays Until Final Siren To Avoid Traffic

“After the final siren sounds, I’m able to leisurely waltz out of there feeling recharged and ready to pretend football doesn’t exist for another week"