Entire Country Suddenly Realises It Doesn’t Actually Like Soccer
“Toughen up and play a real sport mate, soccer is for soft pansy wankers”
Ross Lyon Claims The 158-25 Score Flattered Geelong
"We had a couple of 50/50 calls go against us early in the second quarter. If they’re called our way, who knows?"
Retiring Winx Too Emotional For Post-Race Interview
Winx’s trainer and close personal friend, Chris Waller wasn’t surprised that the touching finale to her career left the record-breaker lost for words.
Remainder Of Ashes To Be Decided By Test Match Board Game If Rain Persists
"We're confident it will still be a very exciting contest" said a spokesperson for the English Cricket Board.
Final Day Of First Test’s Telecast Just Warney Abusing Starc And Hobart
"The early finish has allowed us to give Warney a platform for his objective opinions"
World Cup Purist Struggles To Explain Why Aussie ‘Football’ Team Called Socceroos
“The sport is football. Real fans know them as the Footballroos”