Despite Malfunctions, Boeing Announces Faulty CEO Will Continue Operating Until Year’s End
“Look, I’m not really involved in the plane side of the business"
Audi Drivers Furious About Release Of ‘Tiny Penis’ Emoji
“Not that it’s true…if anything, driving an Audi proves you have an enormous penis"
Lifetime Of Carbo-loading Prepares Accountant For Charity Run
Excessive consumption of high-carbohydrate foods is the perfect preparation for a half-marathon, it has been confirmed.
Flamethrower Licenses Approved If Citizens Confirm They Thought They Saw A Cockroach Crawl Under...
A law has recently been passed to allow all Australians important access to flamethrowers and other ‘tools’ if they believe they might have seen a cockroach inside their home.
George R.R. Martin Spotted Umpiring At Wimbledon To Avoid Writing The Winds Of Winter
“He’ll literally do anything to avoid writing the book, and he’s got so much pull around the world that he can make his ridiculous excuses a reality"
Borderline Acquaintances Trying Equally Hard To Pretend They Didn’t Recognise Each Other
“She must have started working around here, I reckon I see her two or three times a week now”