‘You’re Welcome Kids’ Says Man Who Donated $2.35 To Biggest Morning Tea Fundraiser
“Cop that cancer” he was also heard saying while dumping his shrapnel collection into a donation bucket.
Psychic Unsure If Her Business Has Much Of A Future
‘Esmeralda the Clairvoyant’ (or Emma Rogers according to her driver’s licence) has been reading tea leaves since before she could drink the beverage they create, but now fears the industry is in decline.
Burglar Sues Shop Owner For Falsely Claiming There Was No Cash Left On Premises
“Like anyone, thieves need income, so my client scouted out some opportunities for work in the area”
Genius Puts Food Too Hot For Fingers Into Mouth
Witnesses told Seems Legit that he then made a series of awkward screaming noises as he attempted to cool the food with his breath while it was still in his open mouth.
Annoying Bloke Inches Concerningly Closer To Guitar At House Party
“He was chatting to me about the advantages of rolling his own cigarettes when he caught sight of it. He trailed off and did a double-take…it’s just a matter of time now”.
