Friday, February 13, 2026

Man Unsure Whether He Really Needs To ‘Safely Eject USB’ Or Can Just Yank...

“I’ve seen other people be so cavalier with their USB drives, and they never seem to have any problems”

Slow Witted Man Needs To Pause ‘Reading Bits’ In Movies

A night of ‘Netflix and chill’ has gone horribly wrong for Connor (27) after it became apparent he needs to pause the text parts of films because otherwise they disappear before he’s finished reading them.

Guy Flees Party To Escape Awkwardness Of Waiting In Line To Greet Birthday Girl

“I couldn’t see anyone else I knew, so greeting Jane was the only available choice"
Food Too Hot

Genius Puts Food Too Hot For Fingers Into Mouth

Witnesses told Seems Legit that he then made a series of awkward screaming noises as he attempted to cool the food with his breath while it was still in his open mouth.

Manager Says A-sap Because Pronouncing A.S.A.P. Wastes Time He Can’t Afford

A very busy and important manager for an architectural agency, has recently begun using the term ‘A-sap’ when making an urgent request.

Man Begins Eating Curry Lunch In Crowded Three Floor Elevator

An IT worker began eating his takeaway container of lamb vindaloo and rice during what turned out to be an eighteen second elevator ride to the third level of his office building, it has emerged.