Audi Drivers Furious About Release Of ‘Tiny Penis’ Emoji
“Not that it’s true…if anything, driving an Audi proves you have an enormous penis"
Confused Man Frames Rare Roast Beef Bought From Supermarket, Believing It Will Rise In...
An idiotic South Australian man named Derek, has recently had a small portion of rare roast beef framed in glass to ‘maximise profits’.
George R.R. Martin Spotted Umpiring At Wimbledon To Avoid Writing The Winds Of Winter
“He’ll literally do anything to avoid writing the book, and he’s got so much pull around the world that he can make his ridiculous excuses a reality"
Slow Walking Trio Takes Over Footpath, Set Sights On Rest Of The World
Three co-workers, armed with nothing other than mediocre gossip, have managed to completely block a footpath, preventing humans walking at normal speed from getting past.
Rookie Council Worker Foolishly Thinks He’s Ready To Hold A ‘Slow’ Sign
"I’ve been crushing it standing around in hi-vis looking at the bloke using the forklift ay, and I’m regularly breaking the 50% barrier for getting the morning coffee orders right. I’m ready”
Cows Who Humans Eat And Wear The Skin Of Blamed For Climate Change
A report has revealed that cows are now being blamed for the climate change that is destroying our planet, due to the methane gas they release.