Monday, December 8, 2025

Man Unsure Whether He Really Needs To ‘Safely Eject USB’ Or Can Just Yank...

“I’ve seen other people be so cavalier with their USB drives, and they never seem to have any problems”
Psychic Unsure

Psychic Unsure If Her Business Has Much Of A Future

‘Esmeralda the Clairvoyant’ (or Emma Rogers according to her driver’s licence) has been reading tea leaves since before she could drink the beverage they create, but now fears the industry is in decline.

Lifetime Of Carbo-loading Prepares Accountant For Charity Run

Excessive consumption of high-carbohydrate foods is the perfect preparation for a half-marathon, it has been confirmed.
Cows Climate Change

Cows Who Humans Eat And Wear The Skin Of Blamed For Climate Change

A report has revealed that cows are now being blamed for the climate change that is destroying our planet, due to the methane gas they release.
Slow Walking Trio

Slow Walking Trio Takes Over Footpath, Set Sights On Rest Of The World

Three co-workers, armed with nothing other than mediocre gossip, have managed to completely block a footpath, preventing humans walking at normal speed from getting past.
Tailgating

Report: Tailgating Gets You To Your Horrible Job 1.2 Seconds Faster

A recent study has found that tailgating can get you to work more than a full second faster than driving normally.