Tuesday, March 24, 2026

Lifetime Of Carbo-loading Prepares Accountant For Charity Run

Excessive consumption of high-carbohydrate foods is the perfect preparation for a half-marathon, it has been confirmed.
Biggest Morning Tea

‘You’re Welcome Kids’ Says Man Who Donated $2.35 To Biggest Morning Tea Fundraiser

“Cop that cancer” he was also heard saying while dumping his shrapnel collection into a donation bucket.
New Neighbour

New Neighbour Ingratiates Himself By Moving In At 5am On Sunday

“I really appreciate it” said Stephanie, a surgeon who lives next door and will now be working off four hours less sleep as she attempts to save lives today.
Top Bloke Butcher

Top Bloke Butcher Wipes Off Cost For Extra 13 Grams Of Ham

A supermarket butcher has been a bright spark in the otherwise depressing life of Andy (37) after not charging him for a very small amount of extra meat with his order.

Milo 4.5 Health Star Rating Assumes Sprinkling It On Salad

“It’s obviously only meant to be consumed in very small portions as a salad dressing, and I think you’ll find it’s much lower in fat than most alternatives"
Boomer Internet

Boomer Spends Hours Complaining To Internet Company For Wasting His Time

A former small business owner has unleashed a tirade of abuse on his internet provider, due to what appears to have been a fairly minor inconvenience.