A local anti-vaxxer has strayed from their recently discovered caution towards medicine after waking up with a ‘migraine’.
Sharon assured us that this was unrelated to the multiple bottles of cheap wine and other ‘substances’ she had on a big night out with the girls.
“I don’t care what’s in it” she told her doctor who tried to caution her on the dangers of taking such powerful medication.
“I just want it to knock me the f@#k out!”
Sharon then explained to Seems Legit how you can’t trust anything the extensively trained medical professionals say.
“I wanted to get Oxycontin because I’ve heard great things about it, but the idiot doctor refused to prescribe it.
“But he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Opioids like Oxycontin are actually really safe.
“I’ve watched a bunch of YouTube videos about it and the guy said the claim they’ve killed half a million Americans in the last 20 years is absolute crap. Apparently it’s only like 450,000.
“This is why I constantly change doctors because they don’t do their own research.
“The last one told me not to have heavy painkillers while I’m on Tripballzopan for my anxiety, but I’ve tried it since then and had a great time” Sharon added as her left eye twitched.
“If they don’t know about that, as if I’m going to trust them when they recommend a virtually untested vaccine. Honestly, who knows what they put in them”.
Sharon was undeterred when we pointed out that in addition to the arduous testing before it became publicly available, there have already been several billion administered doses of the Pfizer vaccine that she thinks is too dangerous, and suggested that she might not know what’s in the other medications she’s been taking either.
“Painkillers and anxiety meds are different. I’ve never heard of anyone having an issue with those, but my neighbour’s sister has a friend who used to work with someone that was totally fine before they had their jab, and then boom, suddenly they’re stuck in bed for days.
“It’s just too much of a risk! I need solid data I can trust before I’ll consider it, and all the memes I’ve seen about it so far have said there isn’t any”.
When we proposed that she probably didn’t know what had been added to the cocaine she snorted off a toilet seat last night, she insisted that was different.
“Dealers know they can’t do anything dodgy, otherwise they’ll get a bad rep and people won’t buy from them anymore. That’s how the system ensures everything is safe, probably”.
