Friday, March 29, 2024
Cows Climate Change

Cows Who Humans Eat And Wear The Skin Of Blamed For Climate Change

A report has revealed that cows are now being blamed for the climate change that is destroying our planet, due to the methane gas they release.
Cockroach Flamethrower

Flamethrower Licenses Approved If Citizens Confirm They Thought They Saw A Cockroach Crawl Under...

A law has recently been passed to allow all Australians important access to flamethrowers and other ‘tools’ if they believe they might have seen a cockroach inside their home.
Boomer Internet

Boomer Spends Hours Complaining To Internet Company For Wasting His Time

A former small business owner has unleashed a tirade of abuse on his internet provider, due to what appears to have been a fairly minor inconvenience.
Scomo Vaccine

Scomo Admits He’s Pretty Relieved He Managed To Get Vaccine Before Supply Issue

“It’s a good thing the state Premiers mostly managed to eradicate the virus in this country, otherwise people would be really pissed at the moment"
Flossing

Realistic Dentist Recommends Flossing At Least 2-3 Times Per Lifetime

"I realised I barely even floss myself because it’s super annoying so stopped giving my patients such a hard time about it”

Report: Trump Typed LOL When He Wasn’t Actually Laughing Out Loud

Multiple staffers witnessed Mr Trump typing 'LOL' in reply to a text message from a good friend by the name of Vladimir, despite not even cracking a smile.