Wednesday, September 23, 2020

Girl With Name Spelt ‘Siobhan’ Claims It’s Pronounced ‘Jessica’

A TAFE student of Irish ancestry has taken exception to the mispronunciation of her name during a lecturer’s roll call, it has emerged.
Food Too Hot

Genius Puts Food Too Hot For Fingers Into Mouth

Witnesses told Seems Legit that he then made a series of awkward screaming noises as he attempted to cool the food with his breath while it was still in his open mouth.
I Stopped These

Peter Dutton’s ‘I Stopped These’ Trophy Even More Disturbing Than PM’s

“He’s really proud of how he’s protected Australia from the dangerous children who pose such a threat to our way of life”
Burning Nike Shoes

Nike Devastated People Are Burning Shoes They Already Paid For

"That's really showed us how barbaric we were in supporting someone who is non-violently protesting against innocent African Americans being killed by police"
Borderline Acquaintances

Borderline Acquaintances Trying Equally Hard To Pretend They Didn’t Recognise Each Other

“She must have started working around here, I reckon I see her two or three times a week now”
Trump Caps Lock

Trump Wins ‘Mother Of All Wars’ With Devastating Use Of Caps Lock

The tweet is understood to have completely obliterated Iran’s Twitter infrastructure, neutralising their ability to retaliate.