Audi Drivers Furious About Release Of ‘Tiny Penis’ Emoji
“Not that it’s true…if anything, driving an Audi proves you have an enormous penis"
Annoying Bloke Inches Concerningly Closer To Guitar At House Party
“He was chatting to me about the advantages of rolling his own cigarettes when he caught sight of it. He trailed off and did a double-take…it’s just a matter of time now”.
Genius Puts Food Too Hot For Fingers Into Mouth
Witnesses told Seems Legit that he then made a series of awkward screaming noises as he attempted to cool the food with his breath while it was still in his open mouth.
Realistic Dentist Recommends Flossing At Least 2-3 Times Per Lifetime
"I realised I barely even floss myself because it’s super annoying so stopped giving my patients such a hard time about it”
Guy Doing Exercise To Feel Good Is Sore And Tired Every Day
“Just gotta re-train the muscles into getting used to the workout before it gets easier…well that’s what Gunter, my PT says anyway”.
Manager Says A-sap Because Pronouncing A.S.A.P. Wastes Time He Can’t Afford
A very busy and important manager for an architectural agency, has recently begun using the term ‘A-sap’ when making an urgent request.