Sunday, April 5, 2026
Cockroach Flamethrower

Flamethrower Licenses Approved If Citizens Confirm They Thought They Saw A Cockroach Crawl Under...

A law has recently been passed to allow all Australians important access to flamethrowers and other ‘tools’ if they believe they might have seen a cockroach inside their home.
Game Of Thrones

Foxtel Confident People On Second Free Trial For Game Of Thrones Will End Up...

Foxtel's data indicates that more than 30 million Australians have subscribed to the service in the last three weeks.
Boeing CEO

Despite Malfunctions, Boeing Announces Faulty CEO Will Continue Operating Until Year’s End

“Look, I’m not really involved in the plane side of the business"
Audi Small Penis

Audi Drivers Furious About Release Of ‘Tiny Penis’ Emoji

“Not that it’s true…if anything, driving an Audi proves you have an enormous penis"
Drilling Noise

Tradie Seems Pretty Unconcerned By Drilling Noise In Busy Office

Witnesses told Seems Legit that he disappeared after about half an hour of drilling with it still being completely unclear what he had achieved.
Boomer Internet

Boomer Spends Hours Complaining To Internet Company For Wasting His Time

A former small business owner has unleashed a tirade of abuse on his internet provider, due to what appears to have been a fairly minor inconvenience.