‘This Is My 12th Beer’ Says School Leaver On His 3rd Beer
"Beer's just like water to me these days, it barely touches me"
Borderline Acquaintances Trying Equally Hard To Pretend They Didn’t Recognise Each Other
“She must have started working around here, I reckon I see her two or three times a week now”
Audi Drivers Furious About Release Of ‘Tiny Penis’ Emoji
“Not that it’s true…if anything, driving an Audi proves you have an enormous penis"
Lifetime Of Carbo-loading Prepares Accountant For Charity Run
Excessive consumption of high-carbohydrate foods is the perfect preparation for a half-marathon, it has been confirmed.
Man Begins Eating Curry Lunch In Crowded Three Floor Elevator
An IT worker began eating his takeaway container of lamb vindaloo and rice during what turned out to be an eighteen second elevator ride to the third level of his office building, it has emerged.
Slow Witted Man Needs To Pause ‘Reading Bits’ In Movies
A night of ‘Netflix and chill’ has gone horribly wrong for Connor (27) after it became apparent he needs to pause the text parts of films because otherwise they disappear before he’s finished reading them.